If I Could

I suppose we all grieve in our own ways. Me, I grieve by eating Mac & Cheese for lunch every day and resorting to Bed Light instead of red wine. I comfort myself by shopping, of course, for shoes, jeans, more shoes, and other things that are bright, shiny and provide a distraction.

That’s the sum of what I’ve been doing for a week. Oh and reading romance novels. I started with obsessively watching Miami Ink….but the re-run marathon only lasted one night so I had to find bigger and better things to rot my brain on, so, we have the romance novels.

All in all I’m doing much better then I was. You know how it is when you break up with someone you thought you saw forever with…..the tears, the loneliness, and of course wondering if you should call or let him call, and when he does call do you go over or stay at home. And it all creates a big ball of drama that follows you around like a little black rain cloud. As I mentioned above I’ve been eating crappy food (when I eat at all) and drinking cheap beer. I rather enjoy it at times but it can get a little boring. My friends are there as much as I want them to be. Although…my best friend is married and while they are great for a 10 minute convo about it all, or a few hours of retail therapy they aren’t so good for the, “I need to get out and get drunk and be hit on by men I’ll never give my phone number to”. They tend to fall asleep on the couch after a few glasses of wine while we all watch re-runs of Seinfeld. Ahhhhhh well what do you expect.

At least I have this thorn in my side, called work, to distract me and hopefully cause me to spend less money on shoes and more fabulous jeans (though I had to indulge in one pair…and they’re amazing)..

Oh, move day again on Friday. I’ve only been at this place 3 months and now I go again. It’s better, this new apartment, it’s fucking fantastic. Huge front room, beautiful kitchen, fantastic hard wood floors, the list goes on. My bedroom….ahhh……..no longer will I be sleeping in a shoe box. I’ll have a closet that I can fit my bed in if I wanted which obviously means that I will FINALLY be able to fit all my shoes in the closet without pouring them in baskets or using the coat closet for backup. I also have a gorgeous deck off the dining room that is in the perfect spot for the sunset. I could go on about vaulted ceilings and cute little fireplaces but I need to get back to the daily grind.